I got up at 4:00 AM this morning to make a 6:00 AM flight to Detroit - that's 3:00 AM in MSP if you are keeping score - in order to catch a 8:40 flight from DTW to MPLS (welcome to my world). At about 4:20 AM I groggily stuck an un-capped pen in my shirt pocket and left my hotel room to catch a cab from the hotel to the airport. I had wrecked the shirt before I even got to the airport:
20 years ago, when I was in my courting days, the conventional wisdom was the best way to meet women was to either 1.) walk a dog (or better yet a puppy), or, 2.) hang out at a laundromat. It is too bad I am now 43 years old and happily married, because hands-down, I now know THE most effective way to meet women.
After discovering the problem at the Providence airport, I re-capped the pen and headed for security - no time to change my shirt and it's not like I really care, anyway. By the time I had gotten to my gate, about 5 women came over to me and told me that my pen was leaking. Two more women on the plane told me this as well. Another handful of women told me the same thing in Detroit while I was waiting for the flight to MSP. It got to the point where I told a woman at the Minneapolis airport that I should get one of those "HELLO MY NAME IS:" stickers and write on it "Yes - I know my pen leaked. Thank you!".
WTF??? Over the last 10 years I have been in hundreds of airports, and women never say anything to me. I am the stereotypical business guy - the "extra" in the scene that does not get mentioned in the credits at the end of a movie. Part of the scenery. Hiding in plain sight. Today was different, and I am still the same biofodder I have always been (and interestingly, while the women came forward, not a single male commented on my pen leakage - they either did not notice, thought I was a moron, or more likely... they were on to this trick).
Take the Snak Shak Challenge: try it yourself - go wreck a shirt with a pen, put it on, and then put another pen in your pocket (very important) and walk around for awhile. I bet you will get A LOT more attention from the opposite sex than you normally would. If you do this experiment, comment below and let us all know how it worked for you.
In other news, I might have a bead on a new fixed gear frame thanks to friends in the weeds (keep your fingers crossed) and Red Bull is obstructing the Stone Arch Bridge as I write this.
That's it! Ride safe and stay cool!
Ha! I leave for a business trip to Kansas City tomorrow - have to try that out. Maybe on the flight home :-)
ReplyDeleteThe laundromat thing is true enough - in college. Once women hit their late 20s, they seem to avoid laundromats and the sort of loser guy who (one supposes) would be using a laundromat in HIS late 20s and after.
Puppies work well. So do borrowed toddlers, though it's not something that works well at getting attention from SINGLE women. Not that I'd know, of course.